Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Being Sick

     Well, my entire family is sick. Momma is the sickest, she's throwing up and spending a lot of time in the bathroom. The kids all have the sniffles and I just feel crappy. After you have kids, getting sick becomes a regular part of life. Kids are just little germ factories spreading pestilence and disease wherever they go.

     FYI tho, kids that get sick a lot when they're little grow up to be superhuman virus fighting machines. Our oldest boy is 13 now and he never gets sick. I credit his bionic resistance to sickness to daycare. He was sick all the time for his first 3 or 4 years thanks to daycare. Now he laughs at all of the mere mortals in his family, succumbing to the illness of the day.

     Speaking of the oldest, our boy got a new droid cell phone for Christmas. He's had his head stuck in it every since. I totally understand because I'm also addicted to games on my computer. What makes me crazy is the updates. He can't just play and keep it to himself. He has to tell me all the "cool" parts. Most of the time I don't even know what he's talking about. He hasn't figured out that no one really cares about your video game conquests and very few are impressed even when they understand what you just told them.

     Well, I just wanted to say (warn) you that the time of sickness is upon us. Get ready.....

Friday, December 24, 2010

Christmas Eve

  I had a bad day today. Nothing in particular caused it, I guess it's a combination of things in my life. I'm not very healthy for one, I've been over 200 lbs for 2 weeks now plus my blood pressure is high and my head pounds for about 22 hours a day. My wife says "go to the dr." but we cant afford that. I've lost my religion. I havent cracked the bible in probably a year now.... i'd say i've read less than 20 times in the last 10 years. Christmas always makes me question my faith for some reason. i feel like i've lost myself and I'm too lazy to put the effort into finding that guy again. I've always been the one that others come to when THEY have a bad day. I  dont have bad days, see. Just today....   Since my wife is my only follower i'd like to say that i owe her a serious apology for taking some of my day out on her. I've caused her stress and drama today. Several people cause her stress and those people piss me off usually. Today it was me, though and i can only say im sorry. I dont even know whats wrong with me, she's looking for an explanation as to why i was such an ass today, but i simply cant put one into words.

  I'm struggling just to be me. The guy everyone likes, the guy who's always there and always a friend. I look around and except for my family, there's no one out there. I dont have any friends at all, just people who need me to do something for them.

  Of course, I'll shake this mood. I'll find myself again, I always do. I have a family that i love beyond imagination, a beautiful wife who loves me in spite of my failings, and 4 kids who dont get a choice about loving me, they just do. I'd die for these 5 people in a heartbeat. They are the core that my life revolves around. They love me fat, unhealthy, moody mad or whatever. They make my days worth living and they make most of my days wonderful. But, occasionally, i guess, i get selfish and I look at myself. I'm not sure i like myself anymore....

  It was just a bad day, and i feel better for writing this already. Tomorrow will be better, and the next day will be even better. That guy is inside me somewhere, and i will find him and bring him out for the world to marvel at. Tomorrow....

Merry Christmas (I love u sweetie)

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Christmas

Not that I want to immediately come across as some sort of religious freak, but, growing up we didnt celebrate Christmas. While i am a Christian, I do not follow any of the established religious orders on this planet. I read the bible and form my beliefs from that. Jeremiah 10:2-6 tells me that the christmas tree was established way before the birth of christ. "Heathen" people brought these evergreen trees into their house and worshipped them because they believed that since the tree didnt die in the winter, there must be a god living inside it. It just seems offensive to God. In my lifetime, I've spoken to God several times about this and I've decided that Christmas is really just about the giving and none of the rest really matters. I dont think it's possible to offend God because He always knows whats coming and is therefore never surprised. It is however, entirely possible to offend my wife. And that's something I try not to do. So the tree is up now, but just to let God know that I'm not the average heathen, It's hanging from the ceiling instead of being supported on the floor.

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Just me.

Hello world. I have so much to get out i dont even know where to start....i guess, about me.
I am 43 on the outside and eternal on the inside. I'm happily married with 4 children. My wife
is the closest thing to perfection I've come across and I'm deeply and truly in love with her.
My children are my reason for everything i do. I thank God daily for these wonderful people
He's put into my life. I think i see the world differently from most people and this seems like a good
place to discuss my views and feeling on things without forcing myself on anyone. Maybe something
good will come up....